Twelve and a half years ago in 2005, I left an Autumnal Kent, in the south east of England for sunnier climates on the Costa Blanca in Spain. I was unhappy in myself, unhappy in my relationship and totally pretending to myself that another location would change everything
Moving to my dream home, with an amazing private pool, secluded behind masses of bougainvillea, well established orange and lemon trees, plus huge Yaka trees with points as deadly as any finely crafted sword. I felt safe to put on a swimsuit and lay for a restful afternoon by my own pool.
Little did I know that this innocent act was to change me, my life and those around me.
My relationship with partner of over five years had crumbling over time, but I was in denial. My work in the UK had been in some of the highest security prisons, dealing on a daily basis with sex offenders and serial killers. The last thing I needed was to feel attractive, as it would make me vulnerable, I drove many miles, sat behind many desks and slept in many hotel rooms. My eating habits had gone from poor to horrendous, petrol station snacks and family packs of sweets for company.
Whenever I was at home, I was tired, listless and grumpy, not that I even realized it then. I cancelled many social events through frustration and self-berating, nothing felt right, I was better off alone. My partner had no weight issues, so that made it worse, eat what you like and never put an ounce on, why was life so unfair!!! By this time, I ignored all the mirrors in the house and a camera sent me into an anxious dash in the opposite direction.
Running away to Spain, seemed like a good idea at the time, but like all running away, whatever you have in your head… you take with you. I was no different.
That fateful day 22nd October, 2005 my daughter took a photo of me asleep by the pool (something that would never have happened had I been awake!). Later on she came to show me the picture, I was absolutely astounded, who was this huge, old person in the photo? Then she tells me she has posted it on Facebook to circumnavigate the globe!!! I was in tears, I was angry, and I was blaming her, this lasted for 10 days before I realized it was me I was angry at. How could I have ever let myself get to this? Why did I not see it? Denial is a wonderfully comfortable place to dwell; but it is not reality.
I finally apologized to her, realized I needed help and determined to change. This was the second miracle, because through my change and development I grew a business and my own self esteem. This poor relationship and being treated badly, was unacceptable – as I knew I was worth more. With my reducing weight and measurements, my confidence and self belief grew and because I expected better for me, others treated me in a more respectful way.
A journey of many ups and downs, many firsts like going to a gym, waiting five decades to buy my first pair of jeans. Getting the confidence to stand up and speak to others, appear on radio and TV talk shows. Wrote my first book in 2011 Personal Coaching for Change, and the second From a Whale to a Woman, about my journey out of the battle of the bulge to be a happier, healthier person.
The best part about this whole journey has been the thousands of people I have helped along the way. There are so many people suffering in silence, sabotaging themselves, and putting up with a life that is less than they are worth, just because they feel they are not good enough to deserve better.
I have just returned to the UK after many years living and working abroad, starting anew, made me realize that I too should return to my roots. Helping and supporting people to be, do and have whatever it is they want in their lives.
Battling obesity is a trillion dollar industry, with magical cures and fabulous overnight remedies, these are not realistic, they set you up to fail – again! I do not prescribe to one weightloss package, many work for a variety of people, but one thing is sure, that until you set your mind to change, be different, none of them will work.
I will take a bet, that most people have several weightloss, healthy lifestyle books on their shelves, various appliances in their kitchen for healthier cooking and even a selection of fitness exercising items, that never get taken out of the cupboard. This is not to mention the sliding scale of clothes sizes in their wardrobes. Sound familiar…….
There is just 7 inches of space to conquer, that is the space between your right and left ear, once this is done, the rest is easy. Food is not the issue, your attitude and beliefs about it are the problem. Change them and change your life.
From a Whale to a Woman is a proactive book, but nothing works alone, effort, support and determination must go with it, so I am going back to basics and offering a free 20min consultation to get you started once you have ordered your book via http://bit.ly/Book-CoachingOffer and I will arrange to speak to you personally about what you want to achieve.
Don’t settle for less, be your very best and make the most of your life from today.
You are not alone, nor are you the only person on the earth to feel that way, but there is an answer and I can help you find it.
Be happy, be healthy, but most of all be honest with yourself, you are worth the best.